Captains log, entry #2...Scrotal pubic entanglement.

Hotel found nice and easily just outside the tunnel entrance, loads of Scally Rally motors in the carpark. Managed to find a bar in the accor hotel for a nice bottle of leffe each before the bar closed. Cruised the carpark to see what the competition was like for the weekend. Its amazing what you can get for one hundred English pounds!! Cars varied from an FSO pickup with loads of ticker tapes pop riveted to the body work to a Volvo saloon limo (!) class!

After a good nights sleep (7hrs) we set off to the start line at City Europa car park to register. Sonic’s first drive “on the wrong side” was punctuated with an “Oooh” every time a car came the wrong way round the roundabouts at him. Now you wouldn’t imagine how difficult it is to find a massive shop like City Europa… At least that’s what we’re saying.



With 100 cars, of all sizes, shapes and models and all their drivers it was a sight to behold! The start was very loud with the Audi’s air horns leading the way! Yello’s “the race” was adding to the excited atmos in the car as we picked up our info pack and goodie bag. The motley crew of motors streamed on to the motorway to Geneva and Teamrado’s members read the info pack to find out about today’s task Scally Bingo!! We had to take a photo and record the number plate of the cars on our bingo card. All day, all we heard was “do we need 56?” We spotted (chased out of the services) a crew car for lots of points that set us up nicely for the day! A long day of motorway driving ensued (edit, Petemate: boring!) with many very nice French coffees and jambon baguettes.

When we reached the mountain stretch we took a wrong turn in a little village (f**kin GPS) we stopped to check the engine bay (again). Oil was on the inside of the bonnet!!! We tracked this down to a perished rubber seal on the oil filler cap! A true “Scally” fix was underway with the aid of a leatherman and a pair of rubber gloves! When we finished we saw a very old nun in a 2CV! Odd, but very French!



It was Sonic’s turn to take the helm as we hit some proper twisty roads for the first time… He proceeded to shake off his “Captain Slow” moniker with some “energetic” driving to get us closer to Geneva! He was ‘Avin it! Screams of “Tractor!” slowed him occasionally, but he was undeterred. Along the way Brookesy saw a van that belonged to the guy that works at his local garage in Verwood (better known as “The Village”) with the guy in it!! The final leg into Geneva was down an extremely windy, narrow and by this time misty (!) road. There was a swiss driver behind who was trying to become the 5th member of teamrado thru the boot! With the worst of the road behind us Brookesy said “someone’s brakes are cooking”, and then shouted “they’re ours!” A quick stop showed some VERY smoky pads on the rear offside (UK) wheel. The caliper was binding on. A ten minute break and some worried poking and prodding meant we were free to continue at caution. We also confirmed that the rubber glove fix was holding its own.



As we swept into Geneva we were cursing the paper map and wrong turns that it was showing us. A reboot of the GPS showed us we were 15 miles up the coast of Lake Geneva from our destination. It gave us a great chance to see some stunning scenery and some very des’ res’s…We arrived at the hotel at 8pm (11 hours!) to drop the bags and get our bingo cards marked. With 15mins to spare to the deadline we dropped our bingo card off and took a look at the bar queue. With 100 other teams in a tiny bar we decided to wander off rather than spit feathers! A very friendly little biker bar took our eye (it was the first) and asked us if we wanted beer… We liked Geneva. A couple of beers and a few spurious claims to fame (Sonic’s mum used to cut the hair of Radio 1’s Scott Mill’s granny, ya know!) we toddled off for a VERY late and slightly sozzled dinner. A friendly Scottish (!) waiter (christened Jock Mc Tock) brought us a MASSIVE platter of calamari and the nicest steak and mushrooms we’ve ever had!!! At the restaurant we met two guys whose car had blown up on the way down to Calais. That meant they were camping in someone else’s car and needed a car to get home! Cue an idea for the Audi’s return!! It turned out that not only were they up for doing this, but they’re car was in a garage in Dorking, 5 miles from Brookesy’s Mum and Dad’s place. Too many coincidences!!! As we left the restaurant there was much shaking of hands!! The wander back to the hotel, slightly side to side, coined the phrase that titles this entry…



For more pics of day 1, visit....
The Start Line
On the Road in France
The Road to Geneva
Evening in Geneva